{CURRENTLY} May Edition

My life, in a nutshell....

Current Book

The Grapes of Wrath.  This book is killing me, but I'm determined to finish it.

Current TV Show
Have any of you seen Black-ish?  Hilarious.
 
Current Drink
Water.  And more water.  That's pretty much all I drink these days.

Current Food
 I find myself wanting sugar cookies too often.

Current Music
So, the playlist I find myself listening to most often {complied by yours truly} is called Let's Do This. It includes songs by Tori Amos, The Cure, Dandy Warhols, Bjork, The White Stripes just to name a few.

Current Guilty Pleasure
The Bachelorette.  I know, I know.  It's pathetic.  However, if it makes a difference in terms of salvaging any respect you may have for me, I usually fast forward until the end to see who gets eliminated.

Current Troubling Thought
How is it possible that Isabelle is almost done with Kindergarten?

Current Wish
I would love to go on a vacation.  Just me and Dustin and a new city to explore.  Maybe one day.

Current Looking-Forward-To-Events
I have two friends coming into town for visits during the summer.  It's gonna be awesome!

Current I'm-Sick-Of-This
The rain.  Yes, I said the rain.  Shame on me.  But, seriously, it's been raining almost every single day this month and I'm just over it.

 Current Oil{s}
I've been diffusing a blend of Lavender and Wild Orange.  It smells amazing!

...

What are you {currently} doing?

create your own {TIME}

I had the thought that my kids should see me doing things besides just cooking and cleaning.  You know, allowing them the opportunity to see that I have a personality and interests that extend beyond being "the little wife."  And since I had previously decided to read more, particularly the classics, I thought I'd enlighten my children by reading in front of them.  We went to the library one day and I checked out a copy of The Grapes of Wrath.

So, that was a month ago and I'm on page 95.

Apparently, casually reading a book while my kids entertain themselves is much more difficult than I anticipated.  No wonder I never read!  And, the guilt of doing something for me doesn't stop at the needs of my children.  It also includes the needs of my house.  Why would I ever read when there is laundry that needs to be folded and put away, dishes that need to be unloaded and loaded into the dishwasher, etc.  The list of things that I could be doing usually always trumps leisurely reading, even if no one is in need of my immediate attention.

The fact is, I don't feel productive if I'm reading.  And if I don't feel productive, I start to think less of myself.  And so I came up with this idea of how to indulge myself ever so slightly all while feeling productive.  I started including things that I wanted to do on my daily To Do list.  Among all the things I need to get done each day are things I want to do.

And guess what?  It works!

Turns out, the euphoria of crossing something off my list allows me to relax long enough to enjoy one chapter of The Grapes of Wrath {I had to extend my due date, by the way} each day.  And, when I'm done, I cross it off my list and can go about the rest of my feeling like I did something good for myself without feeling like I wasted my time.

I suppose the bottom line is this:  if I'm going to do anything for me, I have to plan for it.  That's sort of how adulthood is.  And even though that may sound frustrating, it's really not.  Being an adult blows sometimes, but there are a lot of perks to it as well.  Like, asking for a lemon with your water.  What teenager could get away with that without being ridiculed by her friends?

Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go cross off "Write blog post" from my To Do list.

my {VIOLIN} + me

Every once in awhile, I'll catch myself being very narrow minded.  Typically, it involves me and my way of thinking and not necessarily directed at anyone...which is probably a good thing.

Anyway, a few weeks ago, Dustin and I were asked to play a musical number in church.  We, of course, said yes and began practicing for the big day.  We tossed a few ideas around as to what song we should play, but eventually we chose one we had performed numerous times before.

{side note}

I can't play like I used to - you know, during the years that I was taking lessons and practicing at least three hours a day - so, I always worry about how I'll actually sound in front of an audience.  This was easily one of my most embarrassing performances ever.  I mean that quite literally.  I messed up at the end of the song, which consisted of two half notes. Like, two slow half notes.  I somehow messed up the first note, did not recover at all and then messed up the last note.  I was in shock, honestly, and looked at Dustin and we both started laughing at each other because there was nothing left to do but just laugh.  Seriously, who messes up like that?

{ok, back to my point}

Later that week, I walked passed my empty living room and saw my violin case resting on the floor.  The girls were playing contently in their room, so I decided to get it out.  It dawned on me that I didn't have to be preparing for a lesson or a recital or a church musical number to play.

For some reason, I had convinced myself there had to be a purpose to play.  And, suddenly, my tunnel vision faded, and I picked up my instrument and just played.  I found a book of music that I first learned when I was 7 or 8, and I just played through it.  It was so much fun.  Memories of learning these pieces for the first time flooded my mind.  I was impressed with how familiar they all seemed.  One day, I'll dive into the more advanced pieces and see if I still have any of that kind of talent left in me. 

But, for now, I'm glad I've come to realize that there's plenty to gain from just playing for fun.  For example, gaining skills to avoid bombing future church musical numbers.

#myfingersfailedme

If you know how to play an instrument, play it!

INSTAGRAM wednesdays: WHILE you were WORKING

Dustin and I currently work opposite schedules.  When he gets home from work, I head out the door to start my shift.  Needless to say, we spend a lot of time talking on the phone, texting, etc., as a way to keep in touch while we're apart.

This is a pretty accurate example of the sorts of things we talk about.  You know, really pressing matters.  Life altering, even.

I adore my husband. 

i love {CLEAN}

I've been thinking about a blog post that made it's way around social media awhile ago.  It was written by a husband who decided he would no longer get angry at his wife for not keeping the house clean while he was at work.  Apparently, the husband didn't realize the house was messy because the wife was spending that time with their children.  A sink full of dirty dishes didn't mean she had been lazy all day, but, rather, she had spent her time making memories and bonding with her children.

I cringed a little when I read the article.  It didn't resonate with me at all.  Even though I understood why so many people appreciated and related to the message, I, on the other hand, was annoyed by it.

I like to keep a nice house.  I don't seem to struggle with finding time keeping my house clean and put together.  No, my house is not sparkling from top to bottom, but odds are if you were to drop by unannounced, it wouldn't be a complete disaster.

Dustin and I have both had people comment on the condition of our house.  I'm usually at a loss for words when things like this are said because I don't think I'm doing anything abnormal with my time that would explain why my house is clean.

But what I took away from the article was that maybe my house is clean because I'm not spending enough quality time with my children....

...but then reality set in and I began thinking things like this:

I declutter frequently

Everything I owe belongs in a specific area of my house, if not an exact location

I am picking up, straightening, folding, loading and unloading things all throughout the day

If I notice something needs to be done, I'll think about how long it'll take me to complete it: "It'll take me three minutes to unload the dishwasher."  Or, "It'll take two seconds for me to put those shoes away."  For some reason, understanding that a mundane task will be complete in a matter of seconds really motivates me to just get it done.

When all is said and done, I guess I view maintaining a clean house as a good thing for my children.  They know where things are, they know where things go, they put their dishes in the sink when they're finished with them and they throw their own garbage away.

Of course, I could be better at the quality time with my children.  And, yes, the laundry can wait to be folded if LL wants to snuggle while we watch The Pirate Fairy for the millionth time.  Obviously, my children's needs are a priority over the sparkling, shining state of my house.

But the condition of my house is a priority too - one that I think my children will appreciate one day.

MUSIC mondays: PERSUASION

Nothing is quite as good as a finely crafted love song.  Like, with lyrics that are real and raw and that show how vulnerable we are when it comes to matters of the heart.

I first heard the song {PERSUASION} on one of those music TV channels.  Those channels were the greatest thing to me at the time because I discovered so many artists I never would have by only listening to Utah's less than creative radio stations.

Anyway, this is one of those songs that I can listen to over and over again and never get tired of it.  I love the overall message that, despite what we see in the movies, love is not a feeling that can be switched on or off.  It reminds me of all those times I let my heart dictate my actions rather than my logic.  I think that's something so many people can relate to.

"After all the foolish things that we've been through, I can always make a start on something new.  And I'll always be a man who's open to persuasion."

I mean, seriously, how real is that?  

Regardless of our flaws or inconsistencies, it's still okay if someone loves us.  And, it's okay to love someone that isn't perfect.  And we don't have to throw in the towel after one argument.  Our relationships don't have to be nice and neat and tidy.  There's ups and downs and everything in between.  And that's okay.

I hope you enjoy this song as much as I do.  It's a keeper!

one word: SELFIES

What started out as nothing more than an inconvenient thing to do when no one was around {or you were too afraid to ask someone} to take a picture of you with your best friend, has evolved to one of the most annoying things ever:  the SELFIE.

Let me be clear, I know a selfie is technically a picture you take of yourself, but for the purposes of this post I'm generalizing it to any picture of just you - whether you took it or not.

As I scroll through my Instagram feed and see people post these amazing pictures of just themselves, that were obviously taken by someone else, I often wonder how that picture came to be.  I mean, the picture of you perfectly posed outside the airport holding your purse that's as big as Massachusetts and as expensive as my car, was that planned?  Did someone ask you, "Can I take your picture so you can post it for all your friends to see?"  Or, did you ask someone to take your picture?

How do these pictures come to be?

Luckily, I got a partial answer a few weeks ago while waiting to eat at a restaurant.  A nice girl walked in with her {I guess?} husband and daughter.  She was dressed well and looked really pretty.  And that's all I really thought about her until I heard, "Will you take my picture over by this table?"  I looked up, and sure enough this guy was taking her picture next to this random table.

I get if you're at the Statue of Liberty or the Eiffel Tower or the Great Wall of China that you'd want a picture taken of yourself.  But, just at a restaurant, on a seemingly normal day?  And, why not include the people you're with in the picture?

And then there are the people who upload literally hundreds {true story, I can prove it} of actual selfies to Facebook.  I get a picture here and a picture there, especially if it's a picture celebrating or documenting some special event or location.  But, hundreds of pictures of you.  In your car.  With your lips puckered.  All while flashing a peace sign.  I'm pretty sure some hippie just rolled over in his/her grave.

In all fairness, I don't like to get my picture taken, so it's difficult for me to imagine myself asking someone to take a picture of just me.  Frolicking.  In a field.  With the sunset in the background.  And my hair blowing in the wind.  And then posting it online where my friends will obviously tell me how cute my hair is, ask where I got my shoes, or to say how jealous they are of me because I'm so pretty.

Because, let's face it, you don't post a selfie of yourself unless you think you look good in it.  You just don't.

Unless you're me.

Courtesy of ISC Photography

What are your thoughts on selfies?