to you, the CONSUMER, from me, the EMPLOYEE

The next time you find yourself at a large retail store {not Walmart}, please consider my wish list.

If you are looking at something {like a shirt} and it falls on the floor, please pick it up.

If you decide not to buy something you've been carrying around, please return it to it's original location, or at least in the general location of where it belongs. {I want to pull my hair out when I find sliced cheese in the shoe section.}

If you decide to eat/drink while browsing the store, please throw your garbage away.  There are garbage cans located all over the store. {A spilled slurpee is never fun to clean up}

Please don't allow your children to wear a pair of shoes you have no intention of buying while you shop.  And if you do, please put them back near the shoe section so when we go to defect them out {throw away} they are easy to find.

If your child has an accident in the toy section, please don't tell an employee about it after you've already left the scene.  Stay near the accident and have someone else {the other people you're shopping with} find an employee so it can be cleaned up asap.  Would you, as an unsuspecting shopper, like to trip and fall in someone else's pee?

It's not my problem you have to rush around the store to get what you need when you only arrived at the store 10 minutes before closing time. {We're open for 14 hours everyday.}

If you really need a certain product, please come to the store and look for it yourself.  Please don't just call.  I am not your personal shopper, nor do I have time to run around the store looking for what I hope you're talking about while you sit in the comfort of your home.  {Have you heard of online shopping?}

What?  We're out of Easter dresses?  Guess what?  Easter is tomorrow.  {Last minute shopping does have its consequences.}

Contrary to popular belief, you're not the only person alive and not the only customer in the store, so please be aware that you may have to wait a millisecond before you can check out. {Patience is a virtue.}

When the store is closed, the store is closed.  In other words, it's time for you to exit the building and be on your merry way. {When the lights dim, that's your cue.}

...

Too harsh?  Probably.  But, I wish I could convey to you how much of my time is not spent doing my actual job, but on cleaning up after people's carelessness/laziness and it's exhausting.  I'm convinced if people took 2 minutes to throw their garbage away or put things they don't want back where they belong, I'd easily have 2 more hours to actually get my job done.