a GOOD THING

After awhile, the comments regarding how much my daughter's life was going to change began to overwhelm me.  On the one hand, I was so excited to welcome a new baby girl into our family.  But, at the same time, I felt extremely guilty at the idea of turning Isabelle's world upside down.

How could I do this to my little girl?

As ashamed as I am to admit it, I began having doubts about whether or not having another child was a good idea.  Obviously, we were going to have another child either way, but I sincerely questioned my ability to handle all the challenges that were waiting for me.

But then something wonderful happened.  You hear women say all the time that they felt an immediate bond with their child the second he/she was born.  I didn't feel that at all with my first daughter, but I did with my second.  It was very unexpected and surprising.

I remember feeling how grateful I was that she was healthy and that I was finally able to hold her in my arms.  As I looked at her in awe, an overwhelming feeling came over me that this was right.  Despite the difficulties ahead, her arrival was no mistake.  This is what was suppose to happen and it was a very, very good thing for our family.

It's now been a month since the birth of our little girl.  Isabelle has come such a long way and genuinely enjoys her little sister.  Things aren't perfect and I still struggle with how to manage it all, but I know things are how they are suppose to be.

And that makes the hard times worthwhile and the good times that much better.