November 22, 2011

Monday Means "What the..."

The other night, my friend Becky e-mailed me a link to post she had read that she thought was just unreal.  She wanted my take on it, and even suggested I use it for one of my "What the..." posts.  I was more than happy to read the post, and was even more thrilled that she was helping me keep up my weekly goal of posting about my "What the..." experiences.

Anyway, you can read the original post here, and then the follow-up post here.  In a nutshell, the blogger writes about a disagreement that her friend and her friend's husband are having.  Becky didn't tell me about the post because of the disagreement itself, but rather the fact that this blogger would post about someone else's very private matter, a matter that has absolutely nothing to do with her.  Whether this blogger got permission from her friend to do so is unclear, but I'm going to assume she did.  

Another aspect of the post that was interesting was that people were commenting on it and giving answers and solutions with absolutely no other information than was given in the brief post.

My initial reaction to this post was that it was pretty bold for someone else to blog about it, rather than the people directly involved.  But, then I thought maybe this friend didn't want to blog about it herself, but did want the advice from other people.  Mind you, advice from what very well could be complete strangers.

I eventually e-mailed Becky back and said it was a little "what the..." that someone would choose to blog about her friend's marital problems, and that I thought it would've been a much better post had the people involved been the ones to blog about it.

But, I also said that perhaps this post had done some good for someone out there.  Not so much the couple themselves, but another reader that was going through a similar situation.  After all, blogs and the Internet in general have become a great source for people to know that they are not alone in this world and that there is almost always someone else who understands what you are going through.

I think the most "what the..." about this entire situation is that people were so quick to comment about it.  Sure, I posted about a situation that had nothing to do with me, but it had nothing to do with the state of someone's marriage.  Do you think as readers, we should be less quick to offer our two cents, especially when we have extremely limited, very one-sided information?  Are we adding fuel to the fire by commenting when, in all honesty, it really isn't any of our business?

And, yes, I appreciate the irony that I am informing you about a situation that I have basically deemed too personal for the Internet.  :)


  1. Great Post! I think that we need to hear both sides of the story before we decide what we are going to comment.- That probably even goes with a friend who is talking to us in person or on the phone as well.
    I also think that we need to be careful with what we put on the internet- for complete strangers to read and comment on.

  2. Thanks for sending me the link Becky and for giving me the idea in the first place! :)

  3. totally disagree with you. I think there was nothing wrong with what she posted. She posted private information butdid not use names and give really discriptive information about the couple. she kept it very basic about a topic that is widely controversial.
    blogs are for venting and sharing your thoughts about things. That is just what she did. And as for people not having all the information....they definitely had enough information to make a decision, and considering the hubby was being a bastard it just gave the wife the validation she needed.

  4. Good point, Rachelle. Although, since we're family, I feel as though you should agree with me no matter what. :) Ha ha, totally kidding.

    Anyway, you bring up a lot of great points. She did keep it brief and it is a very controversial topic, one that probably a lot of people want insight on.

  5. I'm going to add to the irony by commenting without reading the post first, but I think it's generally bad form to share stories or situations that you aren't part of or witness to. If it's not your story, leave it alone.

    Of course, it's possible her friend knew she posted it and they just wanted input from unbiased people.

    Now that I've weighed in, I'm going to go check out those posts and see what's up!

  6. Now that I've gone back and read the posts in question, I feel that this is a situation where the blogger did nothing wrong. She kept all details out, but merely brought up something that a lot of people face these days. It sounds like her friend asked for advice that she was unsure how to give, so she turned to the net for a general and vague idea of how others might handle it. This is okay.

    Details would not have been okay.

  7. Thanks for your insight Karen!


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