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January 30, 2017

MUSIC mondays: the SOUNDS of SILENCE

This week's version of Music Mondays is a little different.  Usually I like to use this time to talk about a new song or artist I've discovered, but this week I'm sharing an oldie, but a goodie.

I was listening to a cover of The Sounds of Silence the other day, and was struck by these lyrics:

"People talking without speaking.  People hearing without listening."

Holy crap!  These lyrics resonate with me SO much right now.

This last week I have been bombarded with the opinions of others by way of articles, memes and quotes.  And, I've done my fair share of reading and listening to what other people have had to say.

But, at the end of the day, I don't really feel like much is being said.  And there's definitely a whole lot of selective hearing going on.

I guess I just wish that when I logged into Facebook, instead of a plethora of never ending "shares", my feed would be full of actual statuses written by my friends who are writing about whatever floats their boat that day.

Our country is so divided right now, and I'm genuinely curious how people feel.  But, instead of telling me how you feel via the New York Times, how about just tell me in your own words. 

Of course, there are going to be exceptions to this.

But, in general, I think if we start to talk using our own words, we'd really start to speak.  I think we'd notice a difference in our conversations with each other, and I think we'd feel much more understood.

Likewise, if we're going to find common ground, we need to start listening to each other.  I'd be willing to bet if we engaged in more meaningful conversations, ones where we're actually listening to each other, we'd find that we have so much more in common with each other than we ever thought possible.

But, I'm just one person, and my opinion doesn't matter all that much.  But, I'm glad I'm expressing it in my own words rather than letting some article express it for me.

Now, please enjoy this AMAZING video of Simon and Garfunkel singing The Sounds of Silence.  It's breathtaking.

January 15, 2017

INITIAL reactions

Several months ago, I read an article that had been shared by a friend on Facebook about what traits parents of successful kids all have in common.  According to the article, the traits ranged from having a college degree to learning math at an early age.

One trait in particular stood out to me:  a working mother.

After reading the article, I went back to Facebook and reviewed the comments.  Everyone loved all of the traits, and agreed with them, with the exception of the working mom.

I didn't know any of the women that made comments.  I barely knew the friend that posted the article to begin with.  But, because of their comments, I allowed myself to make all sorts of assumptions about them.  And what I assumed was not too great.

I consider myself a working mother.  While I am in no way the bread winner of our family, I work five days a week and contribute to our family's income.  I work to make money, of course, but also because I enjoy the satisfaction I get from completing a task that is separate from my motherhood responsibilities.

I took my anger and frustration to my blog and wrote a post criticizing these women for their comments about working moms.  But, before I published my thoughts, my mind was suddenly filled with doubt.  I started to wonder if the assumptions I had made about these women had any merit at all.

What I heard these women say was, "Successful children are not raised by working moms."  

But, maybe they meant, "Stay-at-home moms raise successful children, too."

I had a variety of different thoughts race through my mind.  I wish I could articulate how my perspective on this article, on the comments changed within a short period of time.  It really was a remarkable experience.  

And, basically, what I learned is this:

My reaction to something is not necessarily a reflection of intent.

I can think whatever I want, but that doesn't mean that I'm right.

Living in a world where it is so simple to respond to virtually anything within a matter of seconds, it's easy not to get caught up in our initial reaction.  

And sometimes our initial reactions are spot on.  

And sometimes they're not.

And so long as we're all aware of that, I think we'll all be okay.

January 1, 2017

JANUARY goals

I love Mondays.  Seriously, Monday is my favorite day of the week.  It's possible my love for the day stems from the fact that it is my day off from work, and even though that is a definite bonus, I'm pretty sure it's more than that.

You see, Monday is the day that we get to start fresh.  Typically, my Monday includes a renewed commitment to cook dinner.  Unfortunately, I never succeed.

But, that's besides the point.

Given my love for Mondays, it's probably no surprise that I love beginning a new year.  I've lived through enough new years to know that I'm pretty pathetic when it comes to resolving my new year's resolutions.  I'm awesome at making such resolutions, but the awesomeness stops there.

Given my track record, I have decided to make monthly resolutions in an effort to be more successful. For now, my resolutions will be simple and small.

Here are my January goals:

READ two books
The two books I have chosen to read are "Room" by Emma Donoghue and "Attachments" by Rainbow Rowell

WRITE four blog posts
I already have two posts in mind, and I think you will like them!

Those are my only two goals for January.  Small and simple and, given that I love to read and write, hopefully easy and enjoyable.  

Welcome, 2017!